Miss you, Bhai!

(In remembrance of you, bhai (brother))

28/05/09

Life is so unpredictable. I couldn’t imagine my ears when I heard the news. I teared too much that I couldn’t have the energy to think, to work and to dance.

May you rest in peace, Bhai. You’ve been the closest cousin brother despite the age gap between us. You’re even the best cousin brother I have and too many memories that are left imprint in my mind.

(The coffee shop, the white SATs uniform, Manchester United Diehard fan (I still couldn’t believe you departed on the same day as the MAN U lost), the holidays, Sydney moments- especially the time you wanted to buy the cigarette maker(FUNNY), frequent questions about my motorbike practical and even funny “scolding” on my busy-ness when it comes to projects/presentations!)

I can never forget all these! I couldn’t believe that it will be my last time talking to you till you left me the next day. Till now, I can never accept the fact that you’re gone. Seriously, everyone feels that way too. I just don’t feel that permanent departure of yours. But when I bid my last goodbye and kiss to you, I tried my very best to accept it.

I’ve to thank god that I’m able to see you for the very last time despite me attending my presentation. I’m certain you’ll be categorizing under God’s favourite because you’re such a good and religious person! Amin ((:

I’ll do my part as an aunty. My dearest nieces and nephews, you can count on me always my dears. You’re as important to me apart from my family. You’re the closest ever! I love you my dears. We’ll go through this together and may Allah bless us, amin.

takecare love.

*CONFIDENT-LESS*

It’s 3 in the morning and I still can’t sleep.
I’m either had too long hours of sleep yesterday afternoon or

something bothering me right now.

I can’t decide on that.

I think you’re lying to me and

I think you’re lying to everyone else too.

Oh what not, I don’t bother a single shit. I’m way better off thinking about my mid-term test right now!

Anyways, these weeks are going to kill me terribly, I predict. I’m hoping that I’ll survive greatly and not drown into it.

Oh god, let me manage my time fully.

I’ve been engaging myself with face book quizzes and as much as it’s helping to kill my boredom, I just love it. Even though I know how crappy and illogical those quizzes are. It’s funny though!

And as days goes by, I’m thinking of my TP! I’ve got no confidence that I’ll passed at my very first time. That is so not me, I know but Argh! Will you be there to bless me through?

Please, god.

Okay goodnight.

I shall continue with those quizzes till I feel like sleeping!

P/s: Oh no, I've gain a little too much fats now :(
Takecare love.

TEARS,

Mummy dearest, I miss you and I know god loves you more. I must say that I’m very lucky among anyone else because you always appear in my dream on every death anniversaries of yours. I know you’re always with me and I’ve never regretted for not showing my love to you on your remaining days. Every time when I thought of you, the same old memories played in my mind. The day when I cried saying how much I love you, the day I felt sorry for sitting on your amputated leg because you know I love sitting on your lap, the day I was scared to talk to you when you were sickly bedridden (how stupid am I), the day when your son told me you’ve passed away ( I couldn’t believe my ears), those days I drank your milk though you weren’t my mum and those days you brought me up with so much love when I was just a month old! How can I not love you more than a mother? Only one thing I regretted for not doing. The only day I left to study for my exam and wasn’t there to keep you accompany and you left me without a word. How unfair =’(

******************************

So, I was freaking late for my APEL class last Friday. Ammi must be wondering why I wasn’t angry at her for not waking me up since she’s home. I wouldn’t want to blame her but instead thanked her because if not I wouldn’t be able to dream of mummy. I rushed myself to school and spend the whole afternoon on my project. You couldn’t imagine how I secretly tear when my tutor comment on the whole group project. And so, I’ve decided to burn my weekends by redoing the project! Hope everything goes well, amin!

BLISTERS ARE KILLING ME! ARRGG!

All thanks to dance, I’ve got myself blisters. One of my choreographer said that no dancers are born with beautiful legs and so, I’ve got to bare all the pains and all. Interestingly, Sufri taught us some breaking techniques and I swear my body parts are all breaking at this moment! HA-HA!

( Loghan's (Loggy) birthday!)

Apsara Dance has always been awesome. Akka just got home from Taipei with the rest of the chereographers and get us some goodies! Yummy!

From next week till 11 June I’m going to be busy. Okay, I know you people might say when on earth I’m not busy! HA-HA! So yah, next 2 weeks are all about project submission, presentation and tests! I can’t wait to finish everything because I’m very stress about all the upcoming dance shows I’ve to perform and watched! STRESS! Too many commitments I can say.

Oh well, last wednesday I had lunch with some of my Gerekkakis+ Juli. I only had ice cream since I had my breakfast at home that day.

My eyes are really heavy. I shall get my rest for now! I’ve too much of studying since morning. Goodnight!

takecare love.

FUCKING STRESS!

I’m extremely exhausted throughout this week which really explains the “missing in action” entries! I’m fucking stress about everything and anything especially my upcoming project submission, presentation and mid-term test! Oh my god, only you know the burden I’m going through. I just feel like smacking my head against the wall, cut my brains out and blends it to make a remedy to my headache right now!

Oh wells, I’m willing to spare sometime to recall on my days this week before I fall into a deep sleep! Here it goes!

Monday;
I carried my elephantine steps over to the Comfort Driving Centre (CDC) in hoping to at least pass my practical 8 this time and Alhamdulillah, I managed to clear it this time and yes, TP baby! Woohoo!

11JUNE2009 is the confirm date and I’m so looking forward to it. Insyallah, god’s there to guide me always. YEAH! I had my long afternoon nap way before attending the IDG committee meeting in school and I neglected my Calculus revision, sadly!

Tuesday;
Nothing special but just esday; school and dance! I was too tired once I reached home from dance that I slept off early and had no choice but to wake up early to revise on my Calculus test in a few hours time. Don’t ask me how I do for the test but I’m just disappointed in myself as always when it comes to Mathematics! TSK! There goes my full mark :’(

Oh yes, didn’t I say that I’m a lucky bird! I actually found back my thumb drive! YAY! All thanks to my new classmate who knows it belongs to me and return it back!

Wednesday;
Busy, busy day for me which occupies my whole time in school and I’m disappointed of myself that I couldn’t make it for 5A’s gossip club reunion! Oh dear, we’ll have it soon, okay dears? I seriously miss the old times we spent gossiping in “Romantic Mac” every day after school especially when it’s really a HOT topic to talk about, tsk!

Thursday;
Finally I’ve gotten hold of the Human Resource Book over in TP and National's library! It’s really difficult to get hold of it when many students are also in need of it. Kathrine is such a kind soul who at least does not mind following me to the libraries unlike others who claims that they’re not a library type kind of person. BULLSHIT!

Oh well, I’m such a careless ass because I’ve got the tendency of misplacing my stuffs especially my hand phone! It’s comically funny. I was too engross reading the library books that I ended up putting my phone in between the book pages and left it in the shelf! Thank god I didn’t put it in a silent mode or else I can just say bye-bye to my phone! Tsk!

And oh yes, I’m jealous looking at Katherine shopping and spending her money away.

I WANT CASH, ANYONE?! I WANT TO SHOP TOO! ARRGG!

Friday;
It’s a short school hours and my bestie came over to pay us a visit after missing for sooo long in Jurong Island! Oh god, only you know how much I misses him.

Without him, school is boring, my lunch break is boring too, nobody to look for every time I end school and nobody to listen to my lamest jokes! Only he can tolerate my nonsense,

ha-ha!

Anyways, lunch with him was awesome since I’ve got too many stories to share but I bet I’ve not tell you some leftover stories =D

( She says Frolick is better then sex!)

FROLICK WAS AWESOME TOO with Castillo bestie and Revathi! Oh god, it’s yogurt-ly delicious! I’m addicted to it now, tsk!

Check out this photo taken with Zalikha’s spectacle! Don’t you think I look like Mummy Nachak with her old spectacle? I think so. Since she’s my god-mother, the blood is still and always there. To you, "Mummy, I miss you always and nobody can ever replace your love even though he/she really means a lot to me.

Okay, cut those emotions! Guess what? This poor and tired girl injured herself while alighting from the bus after dance. I was too sick and mood less that I miss my last step and fall :’( not funny ok, it’s painful!

Saturday;

(Sarah and me)
P/S: Wani please send the pictures! THANKS!

My Saturday morning was spoilt by some bus conductor that fines me for under- paying bus fare! Like WHAT THE HELL CAN?! They cheated me I bet! And I cried, so typical of me. To add on, I got my bloody cramps! Which all contribute to my bad mood! But luckily prince charming came for dance so at least he chases my cramps away, lol!

Dancing my Saturdays away till my whole body aches badly. JAI HO! Yes, that popular Bollywood song was choreograph by the Arvind and it’s really a creative piece. I LIKEE! ((:

Lunch over at Komalas and continued with Aspire Dance till 6pm! My body is screaming for help!

I’VE GOT TO WORK REALLY HARD TOMORROW! ASSIGNMENTS! TESTS! PRESENTATIONS! DANCE! BIKE! ARRGGG!

MADNESSSSS :’(
Anyone can put all my stress away? I urgently in need of one kind soul ((:

takecare love.

BATAM!!

Fantablously Batam! I’m a rich girl baby! I had so much fun with my loved ones over at Batam. It’s really a short escape from my hectic schedule but I totally enjoyed myself!

(Imma a rich girl,boy!)

First day is all about SHOPPING! What all girls love to do! Oh my god, I went all crazy over everything I saw over there plus the price is making me all so speechless! I can’t help it but just to grab on to anything I want because everything Abah& Dee Noreen paying! Donuts are all over and yes, A&W too!

Scrumptiously superb! I swear..

Zue'.Fairoz.Ayesha ((:
COUSINS!

Oh-my-tall cousin brother!
Can you believe that we're the same age!?
I-HOTEL! 5 STARS!Wooo

Dee Ayesha and me had our very own room together!

We camwhored,

We jumped out of joy!

Dinner over at an Indonesia restaurant that entertain us with enjoyable
music and dance!

that batam boy got those flowers..

Second day is about beauty. All the ladies pamper ourselves at “MUSTIKA RATU”- a spa and massage parlour. It’s really awesome but at first was too shy. LOL! (Ask me why)

She helped us with the currencys and bargainings!
I likeeee her!

We entered the hotel's dance studio and gym..
While they had their time under the sun :D
Cuties having their swim, as always!
Abah is the best!
The girls with the parent! ((:

HAHAHAHA! my massage attire,lol!

Oh yah, I had a couple room together with Dee Ayesha! It’s double the fun, YAY!

Not forgetting, I had my hair cut! I really wish I had more time so at least I could do treatment+ colouring for my hair! TSK! All because it’s cheap and I’m a RICH GIRL! LOL! But it’s okay. Shopping again and again is still the best!

The baby girl who's forever with me the whole journey!

Board the ferry at around 17:15 (Indonesian timing) and reached at around 19:15 (Singapore timing) If you’re curious, the timing between Indonesia and us is just 1 hr difference.

Anyways, it’s really funny when I accidentally speak in Bahasa Indonesia to an Indian Singaporean police officer at the custom. HAHAHA! Just because I thought I’m still in BATAM!

Oh wells, HOME SWEET HOME, babey!

Time to sleep!

Let's enjoy our sleep just like how she did! hehe ((:

takecare love!

Wet tears,

I’m such a fuck. I’m such a careless ass. I’m fucking screwed. I shall just commit suicide for what I’ve done. I’m burning the midnight oil for all my carelessness in losing my projects!

Fuck big time!
(sorry for the vulgarities)

To add on to it, my eyes are really in a bad condition. It’s fucking red and it seems to itch big time. I don’t seems to think that the contact lenses giving me problem because it’s new. Perhaps, I’m just busy with my workload that I neglect my sleep and yes, too much time in front of my dearest laptop!

AND I TEAR TOO MUCH TODAY =(

Set that aside. I had a fantastic time together with my Indians at our usual hang out place, Arab Street. It is seriously an effective way to release the stress in me. I felt a little high though I don’t sheesha, LOL and that explains the craziness.

Anyways, I can’t wait to escape from this hectic country. (4 hours to go, baby!)

I’m sure I’ll really enjoy my weekends with all my loved ones.

SPA& MASSAGE ESPECIALLY!!
I love my parents a lot! (:

But how I wish mummy’s here to join in the fun like how we always travel together before her permanent departure.

Hmm, I was reminiscing the past with Dee Ayesha. We got remembered on those days when we travelled to Okinawa, Japan. In the airplane, the only noise we could hear was mummy’s laughter! Any idea why? She wasn’t aware that she’s laughing so loudly while watching the “JUST FOR LAUGH” program because she’s wearing earpiece. So, everyone actually laugh together with and at her. She’s just too cute and I miss her badly.

It’s going to be her 5years of permanent departure :(

Hope she’s happy up there!

Oh wells,
BATAM, HERE I COME!

See you people soon!

Muaah!

Takecare love.

Birthdays/Sheesha.

Happy birthday to both of you, Shi Hui and Kenneth! Yesterday we celebrated 2 of our Gerekkakis members’ birthday over at Swensens. It was really a rushing one but I really hope they enjoyed it! I have to say I enjoyed myself yesterday with my Gerekkakis because it has been long since we go out together and eat! ((: While waiting for the rest, we camwhored.
I love my gerekkakis!

(All Pictures up in facebook)

Thursdays has never been this slack. Many lectures are cancelled because of online learning.

Sheesha with my Indians was awesome because there are too many confessions made by everyone due to the TRUTH& TRUTH game. I have to say I’m lucky and yah, I’ve got a challenge by Deneswaran S/O Visanathan! I’ll prove you wrong! Ha-ha!

But still, you have disappointed me much.

( All Pictures uploaded in Facebook)

I reached home a little too late this week but luckily Abah wasn’t angry at me! I think he knows I’m big enough now, LOL!

(This will never happen because he always thinks his daughters are still small kids.)

Anyway, I’ve got a long holiday! Friday, Saturday, Sunday and MONDAY! YAY! I know I’ve got a long weekend but still, I’m a busy woman as always. I’ve decided to do all my tutorials today so that I won’t interrupt it with my dance this Saturday and Sunday. Monday, I will be having my bike practical 8! I know I’m going too slowly with this but I really have got no time for it. But I’ve promised to end this fast so I won’t be busy spending time going to CDC just for my bike practical which sucks. Seriously speaking, I’ve lost the interest but yah, I shouldn’t stop.

God bless me ((:

P/S: I can't wait for my Batam trip with my lovedones next week! Especially going to the spa and massage parlour. Wooo!

takecare love.